ABC Sunday: Here We Go Again

By Emily Latka

So here’s my main issue with watching ABC’s Sunday night lineup… There’s too damn much going on for me to keep up. I don’t mean that the stories themselves are too much, but physically sitting down and watching all three shows in a row, while simultaneously trying to collect my thoughts, is exhausting. I also watch The Walking Dead each Sunday, which in and of itself is exhausting. So as you’ll see below, my thoughts are a little scattered. I will also say that 666 Park Avenue would probably have better ratings and more people interested in it if it were on a different night. It took a lot for me to sit through it last night, after the craziness of Once and Revenge. So here goes nothing.

Once Upon a Time

Hook has arrived! Bless you, Once Upon a Time writers. You have heard my prayers and have graced my television with another hot dude with an accent. I’m clearly not hard to please. But really, I loved the addition of Captain Hook. I absolutely adore how Rumpelstiltskin has been integrated into so many classic Disney tales. Rumpel was THE crocodile who took Hook’s hand! That whole sequence was just really well done. As for modern Rumpel and his situation with Belle, I wasn’t as impressed. I’m sorry, I just don’t buy them together! Sure, she’s a little naive. But for her to truly believe he’s a good guy again was just to much. I appreciate the writers giving us his back story and making him more “human,” but at the end of the day, he’s our villain! Let’s just let him BE the villain, you know?

Biggest Questions/Concerns:

• Belle asks Rumpel yet again why he brought magic to Storybrooke. I like how he later admitted to Belle that he brought magic to keep him from finding Bael yet again. He really is the coward Hook pegged him as.
• And for that matter, Hook told him “a man unwilling to fight for what he wants deserves what he gets.” Hook basically gave Rumpel all the gumption he needed for his future entanglements.
• When Charming commented on the mine dust on his hands, was that foreshadowing to the mine dust actually being useful and/or fairy dust? Or was that just a quick insert to show dirt on hands signifying someone working in the mine? Was that just to give the audience the clue that Belle’s father was sending her down there?
• Oh and Charming in a sweaty tank top? Don’t mind if I do.
• Hook wearing eyeliner is like the best thing this show has ever done.
• I love that Hook is in Cora’s world and that they’re trying to get to Storybrooke, as opposed to bringing everyone back to fairy tale land. Does this mean Emma and Mary Margaret will be going back with them? They better be!
• Did anyone else catch in the teaser for next week? Is Daniel coming back from the dead?! Regina’s boo! Does that mean Graham too?! (Seriously. Having another hot guy with an accent has just exacerbated my Huntsman obsession tenfold.)

Revenge

Revenge has this tricky little habit of making me hate characters and then wrecking me when something bad actually happens to them. I swear I could care less about Fauxmanda until she’s falling over a railing. I yelled out at my TV! If she dies, I actually might be a little upset. Color me shocked. I still don’t care about NolCorp Chick, but I do like that she facilitated some heart-wrenching scenes involving Nolan. He was so upset about his dad! I forgot until last night that Nolan owes Emily so much because of her dad helping him start his company. When NolCorp Chick held up that framed check from Emily’s dad, I did feel sorry for Nolan. But she is totally up to something, right?

Biggest Questions/Concerns:

• Right off the bat, Ems knows that Aidan found her mother. Her deduction skills are top notch.
• So if Ashley isn’t banging Conrad, she’s at least in major cahoots with him. And come on, Daniel! Get it together! You overhear Ashley say one thing to Conrad about not helping him and you take her to bed? That’s not her suddenly being trustworthy; that’s her probably realizing you’re the worst liar in history and you know she’s up to something. Daniel is the worst written character on this show.
• At first I was like, was that kid telling the truth about Declan’s ID? Is Declan really that much of a dunce to just drop it? But no, they really are setting him up. But why should we care about JR Bourne and his son(?) taking the bar? I swear the whole thing is just one big hassle we don’t need.
• Charlie’s mom from The Santa Claus is the boss of the White Haired Man. Who knew.
• I love that the Graysons have a straight-up Conservatory. What is this, Clue?
• I was afraid we wouldn’t see exactly how Amanda fell, what with Emily not having a clear camera angle. But I like that we saw it. We at least know immediately that Victoria didn’t actually and maliciously push her. You can’t put much past that bitch, so at least we know for sure.
• We haven’t seen Charlotte and Declan in awhile. Whatever, they’re kind of cute I GUESS.
• If Amanda dies and is the only one Victoria told that info to, if Ems does anything with it, that’s super suspicious, right? I know Emily had the vision at the end of the episode of her mom holding her under water, but that’s not concrete evidence.

666 Park Avenue

This show is an just anomaly to me. I was discussing last night’s episode with a coworker and adamantly defended it (“It’s picking up the pace! Things are happening! The story is moving along, we just have to give it a chance!”) but thinking to myself that I was still really annoyed with it. I don’t know why I keep wanting it to get better. I just feel like after last week’s episode, not much else was accomplished. The promos made it look so exciting and yet still nothing happened. I just read my wrap-up from last week and none of those questions were answered. And the extra villain we thought we were getting turned out to be nothing but a random guy with a scar, hanging around for two episodes. I’m just bummed is all.

Biggest Questions/Concerns:

• So the councilman is sending phantom emails from the grave? Gavin, you so crazy.
• There were so many people tied to chairs on my TV tonight…
• The camera work when featuring the creepy little girl just keeps getting better and better.
• We know Jane isn’t only seeing the little girl I’m her sleep… But we also know Jane is a dumbass because she put the suitcase in her own closet?!
• Hey 666, you totally just used the Marissa-almost-died-in-Tijuana song, “Into Dust” by Mazzy Star. It’s been used on TV before, but it’ll forever be tied to Ryan’s slow-mo walk with Marissa in his arms. I’m sorry this is a weird tangent, but it has to be said.
• I totally thought Nona’s grandma was either dead in a box somewhere or never existed. But then we see she’s in a weird coma/trance? Did Gavin do it? Did Nona do it with her crazy powers? Either way, I like Nona and would like to see her get closer with Jane.
• Henry, don’t throw the USB into the fire. Burning plastic is gross.
• So the smoke from the phantom suitcase morphed into a man. Was that the man who was shot in the hotel years ago?!

So what did you think? Do you watch all three shows in a row? Is it tiresome for you too? Am I asking the right questions? Let me know!

[Emily tweets about TV and various nonsensical things all the time. Follow her on Twitter @EmilyLatka.]